Wednesday 2 January 2013

Best Wishes for 2013?

Hello you there dear readers (or if there are any left).

I have been leaving this place vacant for a pretty good while, and I thought it would be nice to relive the once glorified days of my blog.

Well I guess the reason why I am back here is rather customary, when I say this


WELL WISHES FOR 2013

But we all know thats just a momentary form of encouragement, a momentary boost of optimism and optimal outlook for the year to come. It is the day where people talk about their past and how much they have overcomed in the past year and how much they would want to see themselves, people around them or even the world change for what's known as the "better".

A day for reflection of what have once occupied our days during our hectic lifestyle - the good & the bad, the rumours & the truths, a day to wish the people around you a better year ahead, a day filled with so much more compassion and sympathy, a day where you wonder if you have achieved enough to justify to your own age. 

Or at least I thought that's how I welcomed the 2013.

I guess I'll only have one resolution this year, and that is to Stay Happy. I know many factors attribute to the word "happy" and being"happy" has its own definition at its own period of time in each of our lives. But as long as during that very moment, that we feel happy, we should be thankful about it. Or as the Chinese saying goes - 知足常乐.

Well, the real reason that sparked off my motivation to pen down my thoughts wasn't what was written at the top, the real reason was because of an article that I just read on YahooSG about "Runaway brides in Singapore" - they blamed the government for causing such a problem in these Brides.

I speak as a Singaporean, from a middle-income family, and I believe I represent many youths who are reading this as I type.

True enough, I am no bride to be any time soon, but I guess, from my point of view, it wouldn't entirely be the HDB fault. I do understand why couples would want to buy their own flat, live on their own instead of living with their parents, despite the rising property rates. But is this really necessary? I would say it is only necessary when there is no living space available in your current homes. Or maybe you're planning to have kids, or if you can financially afford the place. The only reason why I would say that is because I have the luxury of living in a room I call my own, and I don't have to share it with any siblings at all. But I've known people who have squeezed in a tiny apartment with their siblings and still live together even after they were married - No complaints at all.

Maybe it is the way that we were brought up (kia su), maybe it is what the government want us to do subconsciously. I remember years ago, when I was studying social studies, there was a period where the Singapore government was trying to convert the locals from slumps to HDB flats, the government encouraged the locals to purchase houses to instil a sense of belonging so that we won't immigrate to other countries, and call that country "ours". So what about now? Is it that we have a rising population, whereby our community do not have sufficient places to live under? Do we really not have enough spaces to accommodate our population? - Nope it doesn't seem like our population is having a problem unless you're telling me that those that are suppose to be in another world, is taking a longer time than usual.

Otherwise is it really necessary to raise the property prices that high that young kids who wants to get married, settle down, have problem trying to finance everything all together?

I'm not trying to place the blame on the government over here, but I do hear the frustrations coming along from these people who try so hard to sustain a place to call home. A place where nobody cares if you're just wearing a singlet to sleep.  It is already so hard to sustain a job in Singapore, to stay satisfied, to stay happy, to stay free of debts, yet, the impending pressure coming from our dear folks, pressing us for us to get wed, telling us how we need to hurriedly get an apartment before we have no "good areas" to live in, to climb the corporate ladder quicker & faster so that we can live without "debts" or "loans" ++ our body clock ticking. It is so tiring for not just us, but our families as well as the government. 

Is this not a clear picture enough?

We have no time (or so you would say poor time management), to go on dates, to meet that someone special, fall in love and feel secure and safe from the relationship and bringing it one step further in our lives. I look at myself. I work from Monday - Friday (thank god for 5-days work week), sometimes, I can work all the way till 9pm, and I'm not joking. I have heard from people in different industries that they can work till the wee hours everyday, and I have always wonder why do we work so hard for? If not for to sustain that "bowl of rice", I guess we would not even give two-hoots about it!

But as I was saying, the underlying issue is that there is no time to fall in love. Look at the young chaps out there these day, what advices do you get from your peeps other than "eh, go get a f-buddy, no commitment, no need to worry about housing loans or children"

When such statements get passed from one to another, it literally puts me off. I can understand the pressure from our folks, friends as well as the external factors. But as much as dating and flirting around is fun (we all have to admit this truth - somehow), it can get really frustrating when your innate nature isn't fulfilled, where your heart isn't filled. 

I just feel that everyone needs to stop this "trial" & "testing" period before they decide to be together with the other person. Or at least, it shouldn't take too long, it should be a comfortable period whereby you enjoy each other company's, and fall in love, accept each other's habits - good & bad and learn where to improve as a love. Love should be like what we hear on the radio, of how sweet it is, of how simple and non-complex it is, of how much it is less of a game and just good-old-plain-loving-truths-and-open-hearts-speaking-to-one-another.  Maybe I'm just have a hopeless romantic nature.

Do the 4 As - Affection, Attention, Appreciation & Attraction
Don't just say words to please the other, and never settle for what your intuition tells you is 'second best'

If this isn't the one for you, try. If you have tried, and can't move on anymore, let go. If you have let go, take time to heal the broken heart, and regain confidence. If you have done that, and is sure that you have left your personal history behind with your emotional baggage, seek for another.

Because when you begin to seek for love, love seeks for us.
Only when you're truly in love, you won't have to worry about waking up to the same person everyday in your life. Stop doubting and allowing your fears to conquer

I hope what I said, do make ample sense to all of you readers. 

I wish you well, and I hope all of us will find the right love, and not be pressurised by external factors.

xoxo
Andrea
 

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